Marianna Jaross I had entered 2024 full of hope. With a new job lined up, business ideas, and personal goals that were well ‘on track’ to happening, I thought that 2024 would be my year. The job didn’t work out, my businesses were slow to get off the ground, my apartment was being sold, and pivoting my career was taking more effort than I’d anticipated. This year was mainly focused on surviving and keeping my head above water whilst also trying to achieve my goals. Here is wh

Marianna Jaross This year has been the ultimate mixed bag for me. I have also found that lifestyle interventions and practical activities have helped me navigate the storm. These are not all the answers to our challenges and life’s suffering, or meant to serve as a replacement for mental health interventions. Rather, these ideas are here to help lighten your load. 1.) Declutter. Decluttering can be supportive in that it helps us prioritise what we need, what we use, and w

Marianna Jaross The more I meet people — both in a clinical and non-clinical space — the more I notice the bittersweetness we deal with in our daily life. In a recent episode of The Diary Of A CEO, guest Dr Alok Kanojia highlighted that the more we accept and engage with the concept of life as bittersweet, the more content we will be. He aptly states: “There is piss and there is sugar. And that’s just what it is.” Life is often about balancing tensions. We yearn for safety ve

Marianna Jaross ‘Limerence’ is a term that was coined by Dorothy Tennov in her book Love and Limerence (1979). The Attachment Project highlights that limerence can be described as having an uncontrollable desire for someone. It is described to take over a person’s thoughts, feelings, and behaviour. Two people are required for this dynamic: The person who desires the other, and the desired person (the limerent object or LO). The limerent person will typically focus on someone

Marianna Jaross Healing from pain can include identifying opportunities and experiences where we can shift into hope and possibility. Our job in healthcare is to create systems that support stabilisation and healing, and our work individually is to identify windows of hope, healing, and change that are personalised to us. This is not to paint over harsh realities or circumstances. I am aware that people are often under-resourced by a system that doesn’t adequately support the

Marianna Jaross Trauma-informed care means we have an awareness of how trauma can impact a person’s sense of safety, experience in their body, ability to form connections, and behaviour. It can include moving away from pathologising behaviour or diagnostic criteria in favour of a humanistic understanding that if we've experienced trauma and hardship; there can be ripple impacts of this. Recovery looks different for everyone. My perspective personally is that ‘recovery’

Marianna Jaross I am a seasonal creature when it comes to my creativity. My writing, creativity, and ‘downloads’ come in waves. For me personally, there are usually certain conditions for my creativity to flourish. Here is what has helped me. 1.) Supportive people. Creative people are in the business — officially or not — of bringing to life what does not yet exist. We exist in the realm between the physical and the imaginative when we are in our ‘flow’ states. Surr

Marianna Jaross I have been in a very transitional period of my life personally. Amongst connections changing, and my work interests and businesses shifting; I have found it challenging to feel grounded and continue my self-care and healthy habits as usual. Here is some of what has helped me. 1.) Understanding that we are always in limbo. By nature of being human we are always in a state of flux, growth, shedding, and change. We have never truly ‘arrived’ until we are dead. E

Marianna Jaross There is no guide book for when life falls apart; whether this is a job, relationship, or other life circumstance. However, it is inevitable that at some point we are going to face failed plans, an unexpected life circumstance, or loss. This is a part of the human experience. Of course, the specifics of our situations are going to warrant different interventions and support; however, here are some ideas to get started. 1.) Stay on top of your emotional

Marianna Jaross The recent Australian Maltreatment Study (ACMS) revealed the impacts of abuse across the lifespan; including on mental health diagnoses, health risk-related behaviours and service engagement with professionals (ACMS, 2023). Personally, I found this research both validating and mortifying. Of course, both as a client and as a professional I am a believer in therapy: I think we should all have access logistically and financially to therapy and support, and n

Marianna Jaross Trigger warning: The following article contains information on abuse. If this content is distressing, please click off this page, and/or reach out to personal or professional supports. Experiencing abuse changes our brain chemistry and our physiological response(s). This is an un-fun truth, but not a hopeless one. When we experience abuse as a child, we are usually at the mercy of our parents and caregivers. Abuse, including neglect, physical, and psychologica

Marianna Jaross Goals, ideas and dreams are all important elements of our lives, but we rarely account for seasons of rest, relaxation, and reflecting. The latter is deeply required for our physical and psychological health. I am presently in a quiet period of my life, and it is uncomfortable. There is usually an urge for me to rush, run around, and do or ‘achieve’ something. This is not to dismiss the importance of going after what we want, taking steps towards our goals, or

Marianna Jaross I have always been a bit of a dreamer. Some of it was born of circumstances where I would conjure up fantasy situations and scenarios to cope with the other parts of my life I had no control over. However, because I’ve weaselled my way into a life I like — admittedly through a lot of work psychologically and otherwise — I have retained a sort of reckless assumption that any attempt towards my goals and dreams with an open heart will ‘work out.’ Fantasy escapes

Marianna Jaross I suspected I’d become a psychologist from an early age. However, the path to getting there — marked by adventure, different courses, writing internships and travel — was the convoluted, scenic, and healing path for me personally. As I engaged in study and personal healing process, there was a part of my spirit that longed for something ‘more.’ Another key to my healing lay in experiencing the opposite of my past in real-time: Where there had once been restric

Marianna Jaross Trigger warning: The following article contains information on the prevalence of abuse. If this content is distressing, please click off this page, and/or reach out to personal or professional supports. I was recently asked about why I became a psychologist. This is not something I talk – or think about – all that much these days. However, if someone asks me and I trust them enough to know I’ll answer honestly, the question will bring tears to my eyes. My fi

Marianna Jaross Dr Gabor Maté highlights that we have two primary needs, attachment and authenticity. Attachment = our drive to connect with a caring other, and feel ‘seen.’ Authenticity = our ability to acknowledge our emotions, interests, and act in a way that is truly who we are, and aligns to our sense of meaning and purpose. To understand the connection between these two we have to consider our infancy and childhood. As infants, we are completely dependent on our caregiv

Marianna Jaross The world-renowned Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) study shows the impacts of ACE scores (calculated from 0–10, one for each trauma experienced) across several domains including abuse (physical, emotional and sexual), neglect (physical and emotional), and household dysfunction (mental illness, incarcerated relative, mother treated violently, substance abuse, and divorce). The higher the ACE score, the greater chance of poorer health outcomes. These health